Beyond the Honeymoon: Strategies for Dealing with Post-Wedding Depression
Your wedding day and honeymoon are the stuff of dreams. From a very young age, we’re primed for such peak experiences. Generally speaking, this is exciting — but it can also set us up for trouble. As a culture, we devote an incredible amount of time, money, and effort to the act of getting married. Upon arriving home from your honeymoon, things can feel, well…anticlimactic is one word for it.
You miss the daily excitement of planning and anticipation. Now, real life is back, and for newlyweds, that typically involves a lot of adjustment and compromise. This process can sometimes lead to depression.
Speaking of Adjustments
Two big shocks after the wedding and honeymoon involve how empty your life can temporarily feel and how financial realities come into play. Without a big event or trip to plan for and look forward to, it can seem hum-drum to do laundry, go to work, and settle into a daily routine.
At the same time, things feel a lot less exciting when the bills come due. You have the costs of everyday life, but what about all those wedding expenses? Money concerns can feel like a cage designed to keep you from finding the next adventure.
Your former life has been transformed and, at first glance, this could feel scary and depressing. Left unchecked, such emotions can escalate quickly. Spoiler alert: Don’t let them go unchecked.
A Few Strategies for Dealing with Post-Wedding Depression
Get Mindful
So much of post-wedding depression involves thoughts and beliefs about the past or future. Meanwhile, the present is happening — minute by minute. As a couple, you can buck this trend by choosing mindfulness.
Talk about what’s happening right now, e.g. emotions, thoughts, doubts, dreams, fears, and plans. Take active steps like creating new traditions, doing chores together, volunteering, and never neglecting to express your love and appreciation.
But Think About the Future
If you feel trapped in current circumstances, don’t wallow. You can revel in the memories of your wedding day and honeymoon without viewing them as a pinnacle. Assess where you are now, but keep an eye on future goals and visions. The future is unwritten so get out a pen and get busy.
Practice Self-Care
Post-wedding depression can sap you of joy and energy. A powerful antidote is daily self-care. Create rituals you can practice as a team to help build collective resilience.
Safeguard your eating, sleeping, and exercise habits — and cultivate enjoyable relaxation techniques you can perform together. This will fortify your well-being while deepening your bond.
Build a Social Life — Together and Independently
When you find your soul mate, it can be tempting to spend all your time together. This is part of it, of course, but socializing with friends and family is a proven mood enhancer.
Also, remain open to creating new friendships. Moving forward as a newly married couple can make it extra fun to connect with folks who relate.
Also, remember the importance of independence. Each of you must cultivate your own interests and social circle to run parallel to your couples’ activities. Without such autonomy, it’s easy for a couple to sink into a rut that will only add to the feelings of depression.
Ask for Professional Help
Post-wedding depression is common and nothing to feel shame about. However, if it begins to take control of your thoughts, it is vital that you speak with a professional. Depression is more than sadness.
It’s a diagnosable disorder that requires treatment. So, check in regularly with each other to make certain that neither of you is suffering in silence. Depression therapy can help, as well. Reach out to learn more.